Lizard Poop

Disclaimer:

If you are a busy mom without time to shower or think then this blog might drive you crazy. No I don't have kids and yes I just spent 10 minutes writing a blog about lizard poop. This is for total comic relief. Go ahead...judge me!

Elaine, my mom-in-law, brought up a great point to me a few months ago that made us all laugh and made us think. The point she made that stuck with me is regarding squirrel poop. (For the record we also talk about religion, politics and philosophy so it's not like we focus on rodent poop a lot so don't think down on Elaine and I!) Anyway, her question is where is all the squirrel poop? I mean we see probably 50 squirrels a day, but how many times to you get upset over stepping in a pile of squirrel poop?...never! Ever since then I have felt weird about walking around our yard barefoot because I am sure I am stepping in the invisible squirrel poop!

Keep that story in mind...

The other day I go into one of our extra bedrooms and I notice a lizard on the bed. Yes, it's gross - I am not used to lizards in the house - I hate it - people in Florida are weird and don't think its a big deal - they gross me out - this is not okay with me! HOWEVER, I have been here for almost a year so this is probably the 5 or 6th lizard who has made it inside (including the 2 that ran across Elaine and Tom's bed and Beth and Ryan's bed on their first visit to Florida...lovely). So I see this lizard, but have other things to do so I leave it in there and just hope it dies. Well, a few days later I go in there and see it is snuggled up under the decorative blanket I have at the end of the bed. It is literally as if it got tucked into bed with it's body under the blanket and its little head resting on the bed...awww...ummm NOT! So I decide this reptile is way too comfy in my house so I go get the broom to shoo it out the front door. Well after 10 minutes of chasing the darn thing around the room...I surrender. I just can't handle spending more than 10 minutes on a lizard - had I just man-ed up I could have picked it up, but let's be serious - that's just not going to happen!

So then next day I go back in the room and notice what appears to be the smallest amount of poop on the bed. Imagine dried bird poop - got it? Okay now think about it if it were the size of the a Nerd (the candy). That's what I found on the bed. Not in 1 place, not in 2 places, but in 4 places on the bed!!! It's like I chased this thing around the room and then it decided to pay me back by pooping all over!!!

Back to the first story...I have decided that squirrels must poop and they must just cover it with dirt or something because if I can clearly see lizard poop then I must just not be looking hard enough for squirrel poop!

Deep thoughts,

by Megan Reilly